Dear Luke,
When you were born 23 years ago, someone told me that the time would fly by. At the time I didn't realize how true that statement is. The time has flown and now your wedding day is upon us. I've been praying for you (it's not like I just started!) and have been pondering on what to say to you. Here are some thoughts that I wanted to share with you.
A Mystery
This covenant of marriage you about to enter in with Valerie is not something to be taken lightly. In Ephesians 5:32, Paul describes marriage as picture of Christ and the Church. He even refers to it as a mystery. Your marriage relationship is a visible testimony of Jesus Christ and the Church. I don't completely understand, but like the doctrine of the Trinity, I get glimpses of who God is and how He relates to us. Our society has taken marriage so lightly that there is debate as what constitutes a marriage. It is more than a commitment between two loving adults. It's not just a "friend with benefits" kind of relationship. You and Valerie are to love each other with a love that is so totally different than the world's definition and as a result your marriage will be a living witness of how Christ loves us.
Love Your Wife as Christ Loved the Church
This was spoken to me at my wedding 26 years ago and it is probably the key verse that I strive to live by in my relationship with my wife (who conveniently is also your mother!). Ephesians 5:25 says, "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her." Every time I'm tempted to point out that I'm right about something - whether it's in an argument, or something that I would be wanting to 'invoke' my rights, this verse stops me cold. Jesus Christ, the Son of God who died on the cross for me and rose from the dead, by his position of authority in my life, can demand my loyalty and worship, but instead is patient and waits for me. He'd much rather have me completely by my own volition or will, instead of manipulating me or forcing me to love Him. Loving Valerie like Christ loves you involves humility, patience and a view of wanting the best for her. We can be so selfish and deceive ourselves with a false sense of humility, but when we measure our love by Christ's standard, we're quickly put in our place.
Be A Man of God
One of the things that a wife really wants is a husband that loves God with his whole heart. Remember the line from "Courageous" in which Nathan tells his daughter that if a man loves God first, he'll always love and cherish her. Matthew 6:33 says "Seek first the kingdom of God, and all these things will be added to you." You can only be the husband that Christ is calling you to be if you seek Him and put all of your trust in Him. You cannot do it on your own or try real hard and hope that God blesses you or gives you an occasional helping hand.
Provide for Your Family
Paul says in 1st Timothy 5:8 that the one who does not provide for his own family "denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." Another thing that I remember my pastor counseling me before we got married was that I need to do whatever work I can get in order to provide for my family. This not only applies to physical or financial needs, but also the spiritual needs of your family. In Colossians 3:23, Paul also writes, "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men." He goes on later to say that you are serving the Lord Christ. It is real important that whatever work you do, that you give over and above what is expected of you. You were created to work and you will find a certain amount of satisfaction from a job well done. By giving your all, you will be a further testimony of Christ living in you.
Blessing
Finally, I want to close by telling you what a blessing you are to me. I can't tell you how often someone at work or church will come up to me and tell me, "I saw Luke at Costco the other day." They always tell me what a great kid you are. I know - you're a man, but I'd treasure the "kid" part as long as you can. It fades quickly. Seriously, I am proud of the man that you have become and know that with God's help, you will have a marriage as strong and joyful as I have had. God has brought you a beautiful gift in Valerie and will use her to continue to shape you into His image. May God richly bless you.
A Mystery
This covenant of marriage you about to enter in with Valerie is not something to be taken lightly. In Ephesians 5:32, Paul describes marriage as picture of Christ and the Church. He even refers to it as a mystery. Your marriage relationship is a visible testimony of Jesus Christ and the Church. I don't completely understand, but like the doctrine of the Trinity, I get glimpses of who God is and how He relates to us. Our society has taken marriage so lightly that there is debate as what constitutes a marriage. It is more than a commitment between two loving adults. It's not just a "friend with benefits" kind of relationship. You and Valerie are to love each other with a love that is so totally different than the world's definition and as a result your marriage will be a living witness of how Christ loves us.
Love Your Wife as Christ Loved the Church
Be A Man of God
Provide for Your Family
Paul says in 1st Timothy 5:8 that the one who does not provide for his own family "denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." Another thing that I remember my pastor counseling me before we got married was that I need to do whatever work I can get in order to provide for my family. This not only applies to physical or financial needs, but also the spiritual needs of your family. In Colossians 3:23, Paul also writes, "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men." He goes on later to say that you are serving the Lord Christ. It is real important that whatever work you do, that you give over and above what is expected of you. You were created to work and you will find a certain amount of satisfaction from a job well done. By giving your all, you will be a further testimony of Christ living in you.
Finally, I want to close by telling you what a blessing you are to me. I can't tell you how often someone at work or church will come up to me and tell me, "I saw Luke at Costco the other day." They always tell me what a great kid you are. I know - you're a man, but I'd treasure the "kid" part as long as you can. It fades quickly. Seriously, I am proud of the man that you have become and know that with God's help, you will have a marriage as strong and joyful as I have had. God has brought you a beautiful gift in Valerie and will use her to continue to shape you into His image. May God richly bless you.
1 comment:
That was wonderful, Scott! Thank you for sharing this as I wont be able to see Luke get married.
It was also a good reminder of my own covenant with God and my husband.
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